WHY MY BLOG IS CALLED ‘NAPPILYNIGERIANGIRL’
By Hadassah Agbaps - April 28, 2014
A lot of people have asked me "Why is your blog called nappilynigeriangirl ?'
The quick, short answer?
'It is my way of saying #nolimits!'
Well, before I started my blog, I had been told that having ‘nappy’ hair can limit one's chances of getting a good job, chances of romance, chances of being liked and loved by all and sundry.
I’ve never seen it being a problem in all aspects of my current life. It didn’t stop me from working, going to the next level in my education, being loved ( it's even a problem when I straighten my kinks) or stop me from taking part in important event.
In fact my hair has played one too many roles in bridging the communication gap between me and a lot of people in different situations. So in that area…#nolimits.
I’ve also been told that being Nigerian places limits on how far you can go in life globally. There is this belief that Nigerians are fraudsters, lawless and uncouth. This makes a lot of people exposed to such information about Nigerians become wary about us. I will not prove nor disprove this belief because there is always a bad egg in there and no one is perfect.
I remember when I first started entering online chat rooms back in secondary school. I’ve always been curious about what is happening around me and enjoy learning about people with languages, culture and norms different from mine. I loved reading travelogues, novels …I even read through my atlas and I would imagine what it was like to live in a country other than mine….not because I wanted to escape my country but simply because I have the wanderlust bug.
I took every opportunity to go for excursions and looked forward to learning something new!
It’s for this very reason, I was so excited to open my first online profile to join a chat room!
I happily created a new name and proudly typed ‘Nigerian’ when prompted for my country. I looked forward to learning first hand from a French native what it was like to live in France and I actually got to improve on my French to the point I can read French novels. I got to learn a little bit of German, Spanish and Italian (contrary to popular belief about the impatience of Italians, the ones I met were very patient with my nonexistent Italian and taught me simple phrases). I got to know a little bit about what it was like to live in India, Kenya, and Colombia.
This was all very good until stories about the antics of Nigerian 419ners (fraudsters) flooded the internet. Remember ASL...age, sex and location on HobbyLobby in Yahoo Messenger? Well, my country of origin – Nigeria- made me become something of a pariah.
I didn’t realize it had anything to do with the non-response from my online folks until one day out of curiosity, I decided to click ‘New Zealand’ as my country of origin and was flooded with friend requests! Then when I clicked ‘Nigeria’…the online response was zilch!
So, stating I am a Nigerian in a blog I created was a way to say ‘that believing that all Nigerians are fraudsters' is wrong and I would like to give anyone interested in knowing more about Nigeria, a peek through my eyes in the very same way I was able to get a peek into foreign countries through the eyes of their inhabitants and not through what media decides to display.
Being Nigerian should place #nolimits on what I can achieve and I have a lot of Nigerian role models playing important roles globally to prove it!
As a female (and not a feminist or any fancy term), I have always believed that my sex should place #nolimits on how far I can go in life.
Sadly, in Nigeria, I keep hearing statements like,
‘a single lady shouldn’t buy herself a nice car or move in to a beautiful apartment on her own’ even if she can comfortably afford it or she’ll be single for life'
…because according to them,
‘if she buys herself a nice car or builds herself a nice house, what does she want her husband to do for her?’
A woman who through honest work has risen in her career is seen as a threat and not as an asset by the African man…..or so I’m told.
Honestly, I don’t think that should be so.
Does it mean then,
💋 that I should strive hard to be mediocre so that I do not get promoted to higher positions
💋 that I should not strive to reach the peak of my career so I do not become a threat to would be suitors
💋or that if despite all I do to avoid rising to the top, they see through all the mud I try to cover my star with and I am offered promotions, that I should gracefully decline because of what a man would think?
💋Does it mean that if I start up my own business and it becomes a multibillion naira enterprise, that I should throttle it to death to avoid outshining my would be husband?
No I do not concur…..I don’t think that being female has to place limits on how far I should go in life! As a daughter, sister, wife, mother, aunty my successes shouldn’t be a threat but an asset to my father, brother, husband, son, nephew or anybody.
NOT. AT. ALL.
So there you have it!