RULES OF ETIQUETTE

By Hadassah Agbaps - June 29, 2015

Hi people, what's been on?

I saw these on Facebook and I decided to share.
Etiquette is really important. The world is harsh enough on its own without making things difficult for ourselves through lack of basic etiquette.

 I'm not perfect, neither am I saying one should be goody three shoes but etiquette simply means consideration for others and if we do it for others and they do it for us, finally everyone wins and life is rosy.

It's good etiquette to reciprocate consideration shown by others....this is for those who think they are "smart". That someone tries to make your life easier doesn't mean you're the "sharpest" kid on the block. It's the other way round really.



The person that gave you his/her car to use had a plan about how far he/she is going to go with the fuel he/she bought not to talk of the inconvenience of not being mobile while you have the car. It's the least you can do. This also goes for carpooling. Offer to pay part of the cost of fueling the car.




If you feel strongly about it, it's fair you meet the person fuska da fuska (face to face) and let the person know. And please don't start broadcasting who dumped who first. Grow up!
The only concession is in the case of abuse...then it's only fair you do it over text message. Your life is more important.

Please do, it gives your caller peace of mind at least and caller please don't give someone 10 missed calls.....seriously I take this personally and consider it the height of selfishness. Even if it's an emergency situation, the person you could be calling is busy (in a meeting, outside, in class, asleep etc) and can't pick up. Call someone else. If it's so urgent, send a message after the third call.
This reminds me of those horror movies when incessant calling of the victim leads to the location of the victim's hiding place....God forbid but you never know.

Seriously. Don't. You're disturbing others. Someone might be trying to sleep (I really dislike all those midnight calls), or read or watch Game of Thrones (that we were all enjoying before your boyfriend called...hint hint)...unless we have a mutual need to know what the other person is saying, we really don't care. Go somewhere private.
Also don't put someone on speaker phone without permission, it's rude!

That annoying moment when you give someone your phone to see a picture and they start scrolling through your gallery and what you thought would just be a brief sharing of a funny pic or post becomes a lesson in patience or combat as you either wait for the person or wrest the phone from the person's grip.   That's why I never release my phone when I'm showing someone a picture.

Or when you borrow someone your second phone and the person reads all the messages in the phone memory.Must you see or read everything?!

Or when you borrow someone your P.C. to type her work on or browse the internet and she starts going through your files...I really don't care if you want to see if I have the latest music because you liked the one playing in the background.....ask first.


Best friends and family members do this a lot. The day you ask, you're a nasty person.
Never forget that at the time you borrowed that "little", it was a "lot" and if it's that "little" it shouldn't be so hard to pay up should it?
If the person wants to let it go, the person will let you know. "Oh, I dash you!" isn't hard to understand is it?
Don't spoil a good relationship with money matters....it's not worth it.

Guests, please!!!! If the person was kind enough to accommodate you, try and keep your room clean. Don't give your host extra work abeg even if they have 5,000 helps running around! Make your bed, keep the toilet and bathroom clean and dry, wash your plates, wash your clothes unless your host offers to do them for you. If they have a washing machine, please ask first before dumping your clothes in. I'm not saying you should work on egg shells around your host but be considerate. Do unto others as you'll like them to do unto you and I can bet you won't hold that grumble in if you're constantly picking up after your guest.

It's fun when your friend takes you out and picks up the tab. Warm special loving feeling, abi?
Try and reciprocate. Don't try to "use someone's head" thinking that there's something special about you that pays up. Everything in life is about balance. Give and take. Even if it's your spouse, give him/her a treat too once in a while, it doesn't have to be within a week,gbam! Do it in such a way that it's not going to be an obvious "tit for tat" situation.

Speaking of food, you know that time when someone offered to sponsor suya and they bring the spicy meat and everyone digs in? Abeg, leave the last piece for the sponsor. Allow the sponsor to dig in first.
And unless you're playing a game of "fastest finger, bigger chop", don't try to gobble up more food than the rest.
Oh I also noticed something else, in my house, if you're a close friend or a close guest where we relax hosting protocols, we usually tell our guests to dish out their food from the pot. Some people who aren't so used to it keep insisting we do it for them....like leave the work and dish out food when you're no longer considered a visitor?
On enquiring, someone said "what if they take all the meat or select the biggest meat or dish up all the rice?"
Seriously???
Why would a well brought up person want to do that?


Guys, I really don't care if in your house it's girls that clean up after you. Someone put you out of hunger, put the person out of the extra stress of cleaning up....at the very least wash your own plate.
Girls, your best buddy decides to cook her local delicacy and she resist all offers to peel onions (me I won't sha, I hate chopping vegetables), try and help her wash off so by the time she's done, the only thing left to wash is the pot of cooked food.

Girls, this one is for you.....I know we can like drama sha and AfricanMagic isn't helping issues but abeg take all arguments to a private place.
Married people especially those in apartment blocks, keep it down. We really don't want to know how much you paid for brideprice or how well your husband satisfies you......actually we do...who no like small tori......but we shouldn't have to know. Find a mature way to sort out your differences.
Guys, I no say you get muscle but please don't display. I know people can be trying ehn....but abeg!

Candy Crush players....if only you knew how close I was to smashing your phones and tablets because of that annoying "ka ching" sound. I know you revel in your victories but I don't....keep it down or use headphones.
Davido lovers, I know you want everyone to know you're hip and have the latest songs, abeg be hip and channel that shrill music to headphones or better still, throw a real party! I'll come.
Natural hair lovers, I know you love Nap85 youtube videos of the perfect twistout....for all the noise your device made watching that video, your twistout had better be on the sleekest fleek or else tone it down.


 Man wey work supposed chop....that's why I don't understand the concept of rationing out food for the househelp who does most of the work saying she's getting fat.....story for another day sha.
Friend, we are happy you moved into a new house or are preparing for your traditional marriage or birthday party etc but if your friends help to make life easier for you, the least you can do is make sure they are well fed and no don't feed them last....keep a cooler aside for them if there's too much drama. I see this all the time and the friends can't complain.

Nosike till today has still not returned my book and he's no longer my friend....yes it's that serious.
My books are my treasure. I don't joke with them. It gave you joy to read them abi? It also gives me joy that's why I spent money on them instead of buying biscuit and sweet. If you want to keep them for yourself, abeg buy or be extra nice to me so I'll dash you or buy one for your birthday but please return borrowed books!!!!


See....I know you're trying to form bad boy or girl by smoking or it helps you to release stress, I know it's normal to smoke at the bar...I know it's a habit that's hard to break but I have the habit of biting my nails and the urge to spit the bits in your face (especially since you're forcing me to inhale what I didn't budget for) but I don't do that...I take it somewhere private so you won't be uncomfortable.... so please go to smokers corner so if I come there na me dey find trouble.

So yeah, Jesus really knew something about how to make heaven on earth when He said "Do unto others as you'll like them to do unto you".

What other rules of etiquette (social consideration) do you know we unconsciously break?

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