By Hadassah Agbaps - May 11, 2020

Hi people, what's been on?

I try to focus more on hairtalk....since this is primarily a natural hair blog but then I decided it won't hurt to share a little bit of what I've learnt in another journey called life and how I've been able to cope with the good times and bad times.

My favorite quote comes from one of my favorite brands of hair products called "Aussie Moist" and it goes like this....
"There's more to life than hair but it's a good place to start".
It is indeed! I've learnt a lot of life lessons while taking care of my hair.

💅1. DO YOU.

Hair: Not everyone will be happy with how you choose to care for your hair, style it , what your hair texture, length or color looks like ..........but finally, it's YOUR hair and it grows out of YOUR scalp.
Do you!

Life:  Not everyone will be happy with your life choices but like someone said "You came alone, you die alone".
Your life is yours just like your hair is yours.


Hair: You can make the best hair care decisions and grow your hair long and healthy or you can make a lot of bad decisions and have damaged hair....and sometimes you may even put in your best but not get the results you're expecting.
The most important thing is you did your best!

Life: Good choices, good life; bad choices, unhappy life.....and sometimes it's not even black and white like that!
The most important thing is you did your best!

💨3. KNOW. 

Hair: You can choose to gain knowledge and obtain useful information that could help you take better care of your hair. You can have hair mentors to motivate you......or you can choose to make it up as you go along.
A longer path but oh well......it's all part of the journey!

Life: You can educate yourself on the pros and cons of any decision you'd like to make. You can get a mentor. Someone who's been there done that......or you can choose to make it up as you go along.
A longer path but oh well....it's all part of the journey!


Hair: You can choose to learn from your hair care mistakes and correct them or start over with a big chop.....or you can choose to wallow in your mistakes, making yourself and everyone around you miserable about your bad hair day.

Life: You can choose to learn from your mistakes,  move on or start over....or you can become a miserable old bat....wallowing in regret.
It's better late than never.


Hair: You may be at the big chop stage while others are at waist length stage.
It doesn't matter because you're walking your own hair journey and eventually you'll get there.
In the meantime, enjoy that big chop so you'll never look back and say, 'I missed out on a fun big chop' when you see another naturalista having fun with hers.

Life: You may not be where your peers are in life but you're walking your own life's journey and eventually you'll meet up.
Have Faith.
 God is in control.
 In the meantime, look out for the fun interesting part of the stage of life you're in because one day when you see another person making the best of that stage, you may regret all you missed out on.

As a student, enjoy the books and little financial responsibilities.

As an unemployed graduate, enjoy the freedom of not having a real work commitment and try your hands at different things...writing,  traveling, being a baker today and a fashion stylist tomorrow...have fun.

Employed, enjoy your job and bring your best to the table. Enjoy having something doing. Enjoy the responsibility. Enjoy the "beep beep" of credit alert. Quit complaining about how you hate your boss and your office and how you don't earn much.There was a time you earned nothing. If it's that bad, try to make a change.

Single....enjoy the freedom!  No baby duty, spouse duty etc. See the world, meet people! Don't envy your married friends. You have a good thing going.

Married....enjoy the companionship. The laughter.  Having a family unit to call your very own. Don't envy your single friends. You have a good thing going.


Hair: Every stage of natural hair growth journey is a lesson to be learnt.
You struggled with detangling, heat damage, color damage, over manipulation, hair dysmorphism etc and you got over it and your hair is thriving. Only those around you will understand how stressful your journey was....but here comes a natural newbie gushing over how beautiful your hair looks and how it must be soooo easy to take care of!!!

Life: Every stage of life is a lesson to be learnt. They say the best advice comes from those who feel more pain. You're someone's inspiration.You've struggled with setbacks, rejection,  failure , disappointment, pain and  by God's grace, you've become a success and here comes a newbie gushing about how easy and privileged your life is and how s/he wants to be just like you.

No matter where you are keep plodding on. You'll always be someone's inspiration.
That 'plodding' story is way more interesting than the 'sailing' story.

Why else do you think behind a successful man comes the 'trekked 12 miles to school barefoot' story?


This is meant to be my first point but I saved the best for the last.

 You are unique.

Hair: Two naturals can never have the same hair type. They will have similar hair type but never the same. That's why what works for one naturalista may not work for the other. This is why most natural hair bloggers encourage you to try out different products and regimens until you find the best fit.

Life: Even identical twins will never have the exact same life experiences. They may have similar shared experiences but never the same.

This is why I never ever say I want to be like anyone else...because I may not survive whatever bad experience that got them that far in life.

Just read the biographies of great people and ask yourself if you could really survive their trials and tribulations.

I'm a big fan of Queen Esther (Hadassah) in the Bible but I don't even know what I would have done if I couldn't just randomly pop into my husband's office and kiss him..... on the pain of death! I don't know what I would do if my entire family and tribe were to face genocide.

 I admire Queen Esther,  admire her courage but I'll never want to be in her shoes.
I'm doing better living MY own unique story.

That's it for now. I do hope I've lifted someone's spirit because I would love my readers to have both happy curls AND happy lives!

Hugs and kisses!💋😙😙💞

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  1. I just like everything about this post. Was worth the read.


  2. This is so true. I think about hair/life lessons like these all the time. Who knew going natural could teach you about life, as well? Thanks for sharing!

  3. Every lesson was intriguing. Thanks for inspiring me with your wealth of knowledge.

  4. Thank you! I feel encouraged about my hair journey and life I'm general. I find this so inspiring, and I hope to be able to do something like this soon


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